Coward

All this time I have been alone.
And yet you doubt if you want to break up with me,
because you are afraid you might be lonely.
Like you were before you met me.

I can guarantee you will be,
Just like I was, all those years when I was with you.
Now I am done, and I am happy,
Cause now I am going to do me.

No matter how solo my dinners will be
No matter how many times I will visit the cinema alone,
I will never be lonely ever again,
Cause I have always taken care of people, the way you never could.

And I will always take care of myself, the way you never would.
Like any wonderful woman on this planet, I deserve the best,
So good luck with the rest of your life,
I am sure this turn of events you would have never guessed.

You are always way too busy with your own shit,
You did not even know that you were falling out of love,
But you know, the saddest bit,
is that you don’t realize what you are losing until it’s long gone.

And now you do not say a word.
You drop a bomb, but yet you are unwilling to take care of the victims,
Unwilling, unable perhaps?
Cowardly you await, until I make the final cut.

The embrace

We sat there, next to each other,
but yet with something big between us.
Would it go away if I acted on it?
Was it even there in the first place?

You must have felt the same.
You put your arm around me,
the comfort I felt, was indescribable
The longing for more, turned into something unstoppable.

And you must have felt the same.
Your warm embrace turned warmer,
Your face was so close to mine,
You looked so fine man, so fine.

 

The satisfaction

Your lips on mine,
We became closer,
Not just our bodies,
but also our minds.

It was more though,
it was not just a kiss,
it was so much more.
it was perfection.

It was the best comfort,
that I had ever felt.
It was the exact thing
that I needed for so long.

It was in the making for a while,
for years to be exact,
so the moment we touched,
was like electricity.

Now I can only think back,
to an evening very well spent,
To the most satisfactory moment,
that I could ever imagine.

The longing, the longing was huge,
But it felt so natural,
as if this was always going to happen,
as if we had rehearsed it already.

No chance

You are going to bring me down,
Even though you have no idea.
But yet I keep reaching for you,
as if I really want you to hurt me.

It is complicated to deal with this,
as love is madness,
Is this love in the first place,
or chemistry, lust or other craziness?

I know I should not want you,
in any possible way,
but yet I fall into your arms,
hearing you whisper I should stay.

I can’t decide if it’s a game,
or who is actually playing,
Are you thinking about me at all?
There so many things we are not saying

It is hard to look at the future,
when Cupid forces you to,
especially as my brain knows better,
And possibly, so do you.

Drunken Monkey

That night we had a phonecall for four hours straight,
We talked, we laughed, we flirted,
it was a Saturdaynight, and though I was sober,
you definitely weren’t.

If you’d be sober too, I know we would not talk like this,
you would be silent,
you would not dare to say anything much,
are you not comfortable or not interested?

I caught myself looking it up on google,
why does he only reach out to me when he’s drunk?
Are you afraid of me when you are sober,
or are you simply just not that into me?

I don’t know what to do about this shit,
I was supposed to just have you make me feel good,
Good about myself again, after a hurtful relationship,
You weren’t supposed to fix me, just make me feel a woman again.

In some sense you could not have me feel any more like a woman though,
I am sitting here, being in love,
like some kind of crazy teenager.
It is driving me nuts.

I don’t want to be like this,
I don’t want to be rejected,
that was exactly the point,
to get out of that sad and lonely feeling.

I am running from myself,
and I was counting on you.
I need you to keep me sane,
but yet you are the one making me lose it all.

Away

I love how you take me away
even if it is for just five seconds,
not thinking about anything,
making me feel like everythings okay.

A guy with a single tattoo
placed on his underarm.
I did not expect I would find it
one of the sexiest things I ever saw.

As I was looking at your books,
knives stuck into them,
I realised how dangerous this was,
the knives did not frighten me though, it was me.

I can’t decide if my heart is just too open,
or if you are just so special
that you broke into me,
sweeping me away with your charm.

I feel a deep connection,
but what if it’s not there?
Can love be real,
if it is just one person feeling it?

I have tried so hard not to fall for it,
To just be strong and move on,
but that moment I saw you play some old song I never heard before,
I realised I was in way too deep.

Good

“Oh, fuck” you said, just after I took my clothes off,
I felt so bad about myself, so insecure,
but by just cursing, you made me so comfortable.
As if it was some kind of cure.

I think back to that evening a lot.
We weren’t even drunk, pretty sober actually,
And we both knew it was going to happen,
I loved every minute of it, seriously.

The way you were looking at me,
the way our bedroom eyes met,
It was like electricity,
and I never expected that.

We are so compatible,
when it comes to the physical stuff,
I don’t want to think about where this is heading towards,
as the brain compatibility might be tough.

I just want to think back to that evening,
longing for you again and again,
No matter what will happen to us,
You will always be an amazing man.

Stop

Cupid please stop fucking with my head
pouring thoughts in it that drive me mad.
you shouldn’t want something that’s already dead.
you making me feel this way only makes me sad.

love is supposed to be beautiful man,
it is more than just: oh that body, oh damn.
I am doing anything I can,
to stop this crazy love, cause I’m not a fan.

you make me do things I really shouldn’t
you make me feel things I normally wouldn’t
and it’s just waiting for this guy to say he couldn’t
for my heart to be ruined.

I don’t want it

I have been laying on my couch,
fantasizing about a life that is impossible.
I have been laying in my bed,
looking at your pictures, butterflies galore.

What is this, this being in love?
Is it just a happy time to dream,
Cause I feel a different side to it too.
I feel rejection, wanting more from you.

I am not entitled to anything,
And I know love is not about possession,
I do not need to meet your parents,
but I simply want to be closer to you.

I can be ultimately close to your body,
but it is your mind that I want too.
Do I occupy your mind, like you do mine?
Are you as uncomfortable like me?

Maybe I do not want an answer to these questions,
this is probably for the better.
We are just friends, having fun,
I just don’t want this to be over.

Waiting

I am just waiting on you,
like a sad puppy
for a love that can’t be true
and yet I feel this way.

I am waiting on you
to take me away
to appreciate and adore me
every damn day.

I am waiting for you
to show me you can handle it
to show me that you love it

but you won’t.